St. Therese Guide to Personal Avocation - Part 3

In preparation for our parish pilgrimage, let us look at St. Therese’s mission: her mission from Jesus, her mission at the Convent and her mission in Heaven.

St. Therese’s Mission in Heaven:

Her desire to be a missionary further intensified as she lay on her sick-bed and she looked forward to being an even greater missionary after her death:

“I do not intend to remain inactive in Heaven, my desire is to continue working for the Church and for souls. It is what I ask of God and I am certain he will grant it.” (LT 254)

“I feel that my mission is about to begin, my mission of making others love God as I love him, my mission of teaching my little way to souls.” (JEV 85)

“I want to spend my heaven doing good on earth until the end of time.” (JEV, 85)

On Vocation, St. Therese says this: Without being discouraged I continued my reading, and this phrase comforted me: “Earnestly desire the more perfect gifts. And I show you a still more excellent way” (1 Cor 12:31). And the Apostle explains how all gifts, even the most perfect, are nothing without Love... that charity is the excellent way that leads surely to God. At last I had found rest.... Considering the mystical Body of the Church, I had not recognized myself in any of the members described by St. Paul, or rather, I wanted to recognize myself in all... Charity gave me the key to my vocation. I understood that if the Church has a body composed of different members, the noblest and most necessary of all the members would not be lacking to her. I understood that the Church has a heart, and that this heart burns with Love. I understood that Love alone makes its members act, that if this Love were to be extinguished, the Apostles would no longer preach the Gospel, the Martyrs would refuse to shed their blood... I understood that Love embraces all vocations, that Love is all things, that it embraces all times and all places... in a word, that it is eternal!  Then in the excess of my delirious joy, I cried out: “O Jesus, my Love, at last I have found my vocation, my vocation is Love!”

Indeed charity is the key to all vocation: love is the foundation of all service. Love is the foundation of the world. Love begins with the Summary of the Law, the Greatest Commandment: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, with all your strength; Love your neighbor as yourself.

Let us be sure we have the same definitions: Who is our neighbor? The one who needs us, as Jesus tells us in the parable of the Good Samaritan. Let us look further into the Scripture for the definition of love: No greater Love is this: than to lay down one’s life for a friend.

Of all the virtues, faith, hope and love are key; and the greatest of these is Love. Love will never cease, even beyond the end of time, when faith and hope will have found their fulfillment in Love.

What we do on earth will continue its effects into eternity. The soul you bring to Christ will be with Him forever; the Love you sow now will bear fruit forever.

Eternity begins now. Who were you made to be?

Dave Ramsey's Plan is Irresponsible for Single Parents!

Dave Ramsey is well-known for his Baby Steps plan to financial freedom, with most people focusing on his somewhat controversial Snowball method of debt reduction. There are six more steps to the plan besides the debt, with the emergency fund steps (2!) taking the secondary seat in controversy. Nobody seems to argue too much about the remaining 4 steps!


The following sentiment has been expressed, in various ways, at various times; this particular statement is the most succinct:

I think it’s irresponsible as a primary parent to follow his plan to a T. You’re one person in charge of keeping yourself (and however many kids) afloat. You have to do things a little different than nuclear families because no one has your back when the ish hits the fan. Dave hasn’t lived that life.

Let's break this down:

Dave hasn't lived that life. 
        Technically, Dave hasn't lived any of our lives. He hasn't lived the life of any one other person in the rest of this world. He has lived his own life. He hasn't even lived his wife's life! This feels like a straw man to me. So what he hasn't lived this specific life? He also has studied financial principles and has worked with a huge variety of people at various stages of life, in various states of life, and he has seen consistent principles work time after time after time.

No one has your back when the ish hits the fan. 
     No truer statement right there. It's on me. It's on me to make the best financial choices possible with the best resources I can access. My way got me $75,000 in (school loans and credit cards) debt, eviction notice and a repo note on the car. And I didn't live extravagantly by any means. Nobody had my back, but I did find a solid set of financial principles to start building my life all over again.

You have to do things a little different than nuclear families. 
     Definitely true here too. But guess what? Dave Ramsey's baby steps takes all of those variations into consideration.

My journey as a single parent

This handy little chart has been phenomenally helpful!

• Anything mentioning "spouse" I brought in my son's input where appropriate or consulted with others for further insights. 
• I check-marked and dated each mini-accomplishment until each baby step was completed. 
• It is posted in my kitchen, next to our budget for the month, our savings tracker, my son's budget for the month (as a teen, he has his own allowance and responsibilities) and any other pertinent info we need at the moment. 

0: You need that commitment or you will keep falling back down.

• This step is important. It is the preparation and the commitment. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE PREPARATION. 
• Written budget - SPENDING PLAN - with every penny allocated somewhere: as a single parent with a varying income, I have tried a few ways to make this work. 
• Now I am at a point where I have an emergency tight budget that I can fall back on, 
• but I do have a standard budget so that each month, the allotments to each category are the same. Anything I don't spend goes into our sinking fund (not the emergency fund! and I only have ONE sinking fund). If ever an expense comes up that is more than that category has budgeted, I can utilize the sinking fund. For example, I pay my car insurance every six months but I have the monthly amount budgeted. In the months I don't pay, that car insurance money goes into the sinking fund. If utilities are less than the budgeted amount (which is slightly higher than our average use over the last 5 years), the extra goes into the sinking fund until the months were those bills are higher again. 
• Any income more than budgeted for? Currently goes to retirement and house down-payment, but previously went straight to DEBT. 
• I also don't spend this month's income until next month, so that money sits in a separate account (Paypal since that is my typical payment venue) until it is time to budget it for the following month. Then I always know exactly how much I have to work with. 
• If income falls short one month? I fall back to the emergency cut-it-close budget for the following month. If that still isn't enough, then I go to the sinking funds. Still not enough? Emergency fund. I've not had to touch the emergency fund for quite a while now, because I have been able to cash-flow emergencies, including a 14 month absence from my business! But that explanation is for another part of this journey. For now I will say that when I first started out, that emergency fund was being touched more often than I liked, until I get the budget smoothed out. 
• Temporarily stop all retirement contributions. That "temporary" might be about 5 minutes for some people as they move through the steps; and for others, that might be a year or two. Hopefully not too much more or I would start seeing what else could be adjusted to at least leak something into retirement. I had to take a 3 year break. 
• Get current on your Four Walls and on all bills that haven't yet gone to collection agencies. This is the primary reason why you are temporarily stopping retirement, because you've got to make sure your home is taken care of! And you need to stop up the leaks FAST. 
• Get rid of toys and non-essentials. It seems that there is more motivation to do this stuff drastically when you are in the snowball stage (baby step 2) but definitely get started on thinking about those things you don't actually need. Maybe there is something or lots of somethings you can already think of! If you don't need or want them in any way, those are the top of the list! 
• Cut lifestyle. Look at the things you just don't need right now. What can be diminished? What can be cut back entirely? Get frugal. Maybe you go overboard, maybe you're already quite frugal and there just isn't much to cut any further. Do what you can. This isn't a permanent cut in lifestyle, this is temporary until you're back on your feet and able to keep consistent. 

So far, so good. Other than getting on board with your spouse, there is nothing here that a single parent can't do. 

Come back on Tuesday for Baby Step 1: My Journey as a Single Parent

St. Therese Guide to Personal Avocation - Part 2

In preparation for our parish pilgrimage, let us look at St. Therese’s mission: her mission from Jesus, her mission at the Convent and her mission in Heaven.

St. Therese’s Mission at the Carmelite Convent:

In order to be also a missionary, Thérèse felt called to the Carmelite Convent to follow in the footsteps of her “Mother”, Saint Theresa of Avila, through the gift of her life and through prayer which goes beyond all boundaries. Like her Spanish Mother, “she wished to give one thousand lives in order to save one soul”.

When she entered the Carmelite Convent, she declared:

                            “I have come to save souls and above all to pray for priests.”

“To love Jesus and to make him loved” became more and more the goal of her entire life.

She was delighted when she was granted two spiritual brothers whom she was to help in their ministry by prayer and sacrifice:

Father Maurice Bellière, a seminarian aged 21 years, asked for the help of a Carmelite Sister to sustain him in his vocation. He was ordained a White Father and departed for Nyassaland (Malawi today). He returned to France and was admitted to the Bon Sauveur Hospital at Caen where he died in 1907 at the age of 33 years. Thérèse helped him a lot through her correspondence. She wrote him 11 important letters.

Father Adolphe Roulland of the Paris Foreign Missions, left for Su-Tchuen in China, from where he also corresponded with Thérèse. Before leaving, he had celebrated a First Mass at the Carmelite Convent in Lisieux and had a conversation with his “sister”. She wrote him six letters. He died in France in 1934.

Both priests helped Thérèse to widen her horizons of the world. Even though she was sick, “she saw herself as a missionary”.

Her “infinite desires” which caused her to suffer during prayer, pushed her to want to: travel over the whole earth … to preach the gospel on all five continents simultaneously and even to the remotest isles … I would be a missionary, not for a few years only but from the beginning of creation until the consummation of the ages … (Ms B, 3r)

Like Therese, we don’t need to do big things to be doing God’s work. Look at the works of mercy, both spiritual and corporal. How do we live out each of these mercies, even indirectly? Perhaps I can’t visit the imprisoned directly, but can I write letters of support? Can I provide financial assistance to particular inmates or programs? Can I support volunteers who bring the Gospel to the inmates? Perhaps I can’t bury the dead directly, but can I assist physically or financially in the upkeep of cemeteries? Can I promote full teaching on the dignity of the human body even after death?

Therese was physically ill yet see what she accomplished! Consider your personal connection with Jesus and how that connects YOU to the world. What is your role while here on earth?

St. Therese Guide to Personal Avocation - Part 1

In preparation for our parish pilgrimage, let us look at St. Therese’s mission: her mission from Jesus, her mission at the Convent and her mission in Heaven.

St. Therese’s Mission from Jesus:

One Sunday in July of 1887, towards the end of Mass in the Cathedral of Saint Peter, Thérèse received the Eucharistic grace of her mission.

As she closed her missal, she was captivated by a picture of the crucified Christ which slipped out from among the pages:

“I was struck by the blood flowing from one of the divine hands. I felt a great pang of sorrow when thinking this blood was falling to the ground without anyone’s hastening to gather it up. I was resolved to remain in spirit at the foot of the Cross and to receive the divine dew. I understood I was then to pour it out upon souls. The cry of Jesus on the Cross sounded continually in my heart: “I thirst!” These words ignited within me an unknown and very living fire. I wanted to give my beloved to drink and I felt myself consumed with a thirst for souls. As yet, it was not the souls of priests that attracted me, but those of great sinners; I burned with the desire to snatch them from the eternal flames…” (Manuscript A, 45v)

Therese had found her connection with Jesus. Each one of us has a personal connection, a personal calling, that leads to a personal mission for our lives here on earth. Therese’s connection was found in a specific profound moment. Yours may also be a profound particular moment or yours may be a series of events that finally come together or may be seen through the lens of discernment through a spiritual director or someone who knows us closely.

Let us each ponder how we can spread Jesus to the world and bring the world to Jesus. What is it God is calling you to do? 

Who is it God is calling you to be?