Wild at Heart - book review

As a single mother (from a family run by females at the moment) of a little boy who has limited male adults around him, I am always striving for the richest possible experiences when he is around men; always looking to finetune my interactions with him, so that he will grow to be the man he was meant by God to be. I learned long ago that I cannot be his father, nor can I ever fulfill that role on any level. I struggle to balance being his *mother* while fulfilling the masculine role of providing for our temporal needs; let alone the type of discipline, the mannerisms, the expectations that a father would provide. I can't be both mom and dad -- and blessed was the day I realized that I can "just" be a mother who happens to financially provide; on that day and every day since, our lives have been so much more peaceful (that deep inner peace) and fulfilling.

There are still those people in our lives who say I am not doing enough; I am not strict enough; I do not discipline enough; and many other "enoughs". While I can easily wade through most of it from most people, I am still weak enough to seek the approval of certain individuals -- I change our ways, try to be "enough" and we fail. I fail. I make the choice to bring peace back into our home and I upset the person who wanted me to change. I have to choose my priorities. And maintain them.

Yesterday evening I sat down to read through the revised version of the book Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul by John Eldredge. What little I knew of the book, led me to believe that it was a story of what men are truly called to be. I was naive enough to believe that I might pick up a few morsels - small tidbits - here and there - that might be of a benefit to my son.

Wow - was I wrong.

Wild at Heart provides a "morsel" in almost every line; I devoured page after page after page - why? Because it not only spoke in regards to my son. It spoke to my own heart. What are the deepest longings in my soul. God created man and woman to be together, not alone. Yet, we are both made in His image. How is that possible? That we are made in His image, but are not complete without the opposite gender? Because man and woman are not the complete image of God, without one another.

"Every man longs for a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to win. Every woman yearns to be fought for, to have an adventure to share, and wants to have a beauty to unveil (not to conjure, but to unveil)."

These things, taken together, reveal the true nature of God. How? I can not readily summarize what Wild at Heart says on every single page - how do I choose which morsels to share?

So I won't share any.

What I will share is the layout of the book. The first part of the book (half of it!) is taken up with all the things that are wrong - all the negatives. And you start to think "When will this end? Is there no hope at all? Why aren't you offering solutions????" Only then does the author finally reveal his intention: you can't walk away from this sort of life until you know every piece that must be left behind.

So keep reading - don't skip a thing!

As I approached the last quarter of this book, I had only one remaining question: Where is the corresponding book for women? It's here too. Wild at Heart focuses on men but shares the heart of the woman as well - and reveals her true purpose and dignity in life. Man and woman are to fulfill one another, not save each other - we have Jesus, the Son of God for redemption.

So in the end, I am relieved of certain burdens I still held onto myself; I can now move forward with the tools I have so long been seeking; and I have a guidebook for those men in my son's life who want so desperately to provide him what he needs -- but didn't have the tools themselves.

Masculinity can only be given by a male. It's a hard truth to accept as a single woman raising a boy -- that I can't be his everything. But I was never intended to be his everything - he was always meant to have a mother *and* a father - and GOD.

It is only God who can fulfill. It is only God who can provide. It is God whom our souls are seeking. I knew this on an intellectual level; I knew this somewhat on a heart-level. But now I see it on a practical level.


This review expresses my opinion. I was provided a copy of this book for the sake of providing my opinion. All views expressed are my own.